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The following page of this website may contain graphic 'stick figure like' images that may offend you. These depictions represent literal passages from the Holy Bible that most people don't want you to know exists. Due to court order you now must be of age 18 or older to view this website from this point forward. All images and characters represented are 18 years old or older, are paid well, have proper housing, Medicare, and superb dental benefits. The Bible passages represented contain violence and sexual acts against children, but our images and pages do not. The Bible DOES contain sexual acts and violence against children, so deal with it or try to get the Bible banned where you live.

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Kidz, God loves you! Today we are going back to the long long long ago, before there was Jesus! You see Kidz, back then there was a man who was named Job from the Magikal land of Uz! Just follow that yellow brick road!! Hehehehe!!

                               

Anyways though, Job was a very good man since he was always good following God in all ways perfectly, he always feared God, and was against Evil! He was so good that God loved him a whole lot like He loves you! So God blessed Job with seven sons, seven thousand sheep, three thousand camels, three daughters, five hundred oxen, tons of slaves (since slavery is moral!), and five hundred asses! Job had a wonderful life since he was good, and followed God very well!

(Job 1:1-3)

 

Then one day Satan came to Heaven. God saw Satan come in and He said to Satan, "Where have you come from". 

Then Satan said to God, "From roaming through the earth going back and forth in it". 

Then God said to Satan, "Have you seen my slave, Job? He is my best slave on Earth. He doesn't sin, he is completely afraid of me and he is against all Evil."

Then Satan said to God, "How do you know Job isn't your slave for nothing? You have given a nice home, family, and many other things that have made him rich and happy. You blessed all the work he did to make it better and all his livestock are a lot in number and strong and healthy! But I bet you if you stopped acting like a little pussy and beat the crap out of him, I mean really kill everything he has I bet you he would curse you right to your idiotic face!"

Then God said to Satan, "Oh yeah?! I'm not a pussy! Hey, I'll tell you what! I'll let you beat the sense out of him. For all I care you could kills all his children, livestock, his home, everything he has. Just don't lay a finger on him, alright Satan?!"

(Job 1:6-12)

So Satan left Heaven and went back to Earth. Satan used his Dark Powers and had all of Job's children, slaves, his home, and his livestock killed.

(Job 1:13-19)

 

Then Job was all sad and shaved off all his hair to be like Mr. Clean! He then fell down and prayed, praising God for blessing Job with his life. See though, Job was good since he didn't sin!

(Job 1:20-22)

And then Satan went back to God, having lost his bet with God. 

Then God said to Satan, "Hahahahaha! See bitch I totally told you! Ooooooooh!!"

Then Satan said to God, "Hey God! I bet you if you hurt him physically so bad that he will want to kill himself, then he will curse your name!!"

Then God said to Satan, "Oh YEAH!?!? He will not!"

Then Satan said to God, "Oh my....this is to easy....err....WILL SO!"

Then God said to Satan, "Will not plus one!"

Then Satan said to God, "Hehehehe....Hey just let me do it. So I can prove you wrong, idiot!"

Then God said to Satan, "Alright! You are on! I don't care, hurt him bad as you want, just don't kill him!"

(Job 2:1-6)

So Satan went down to Earth and had tons of sores cover Job and he was in extreme pain, so much so, that he cut himself with broken pottery! Then a lot of other random stuff happened, but in the end he praised God and God won the bet with Satan.

God lived happily ever after! YAYYYYY!!!

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