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Kidz, God loves you! Today we are going to hear a story from the long long long ago about Judah's sons! If you don't remember Judah, he is the son of Jacob!
Anyways, Judah left his brothers and went to a place called Adullam, where later David would go onto fight Goliath! Wowzers Kidz! There Judah saw a woman named Shua and married her.
Genesis 38:1-2

Judah and Shua then had three sons! Their names were Er, Onan, and Shelah!
Genesis 38:3-5

When they grew older, Judah got a wife named Tomar for Er. The thing was though that Er was naughty and God didn't like him. So God went out and murdered him! Yay!!!
Genesis 38:6-7

Later....

Judah still needed to have a grandson to carry on his family name so he had his son Onan marry Tomar. Judah told Onan, "Screw your dead brother's wife since I need a friggen' grandson to carry on my family name!!"
Genesis 38:8

Onan didn't want to have children with Tomar since his father, Judah wanted Onan to have sex with Tomar in the place of Er. Onan didn't like it so whenever he banged Tomar, he would cum all over the ground instead of in Tomar's sweet tight pussy.
Genesis 38:9

God found out and was pissed off again so He killed Onan too.
Genesis 38:10

And God lived happily ever after!

The End
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