I can help if you're outta ideas! Jesus Christ has blessed me with many 
talents. I can draw real good and I used to be...I mean I AM a christian, 
and love writing. I'm a graphic design graduate from the Art Institute of 
Pittsburgh and know the Bible very well. I love Jesus SO much that I imagine 
giving him head and fingering his holy asshole while he's hanging on the 
cross upside down. I'd do anything for his hot, sticky love. Hope to hear 
from you, brother!

Behold, the day of the
Lord cometh, cruel both with
wrath and fierce anger...
-- Isaiah 13:9

In the love of Christ,
Travis

ok first of all, im wondering if you actually believe in all the shit you 
put on your site? Girls can have orgasims too, i would know. Unbelievable as 
it may sound, im a girl and i actually have a life, i cant be locked up for 
weeks at a time because i got my period. You wear a pad, end of story, dude 
you have some serious mental issues. and Whoa!!!! Kill all the athiests? Im 
not "churchy", but im pretty sure God doesnt want us to go around murdering 
people for what they believe in.

Jesus, in fact, couldnt physically be american. Wasnt he like, born in 
Jerusalum? wouldnt that make him, like, Isalm or jersalmian? i dont know 
about that kinda stuff really, but im sure he wasnt born in america. And how 
could he possibly be american if america wasnt even known to be there until 
like 1492, wasnt jesus in like, B.C. times? America is UNDER GOD because 
that is what most of the pilgrims believed in when they all settled our 
great country.

Arent we suposed to love everyone, no matter who they are? Even my friend 
Gabe, who is like, total christian, and believes gay love is satans love, is 
still a kind person to everyone, no matter who they are.

For being agaisnt science, you make an aweful lot of statistic remarks on 
your site, isnt statistics a form of math, which is a form of science?

To get into heaven arent you suposed to be a little nice to people? i 
Believe everyone has a good heart deep down inside, im not perfect in the 
least bit, i dont go to church, i cuss, i lie, i cheat, im probably going to 
hell, but you are just plain mean. i dont see a single nice thing on your 
site, why in the world would your wife marry you? i wont ever know. but 
seriously, your suposed to meet people and see who they are INSIDE, you call 
so many people "stupid" and "idiot", but you have proven yourself to be a 
pretty low person, maybe you just need a hug?

I found your site very, dumb. Whats wrong with you? im writing this letter 
as i read the things on your site and well im a little disgusted. "Some dumb 
bitch who is going to Hell because she wants to rebel and shave her head. 
Almost looks like a guy though right? Stupid lesbian!!" that comment is 
gross. A person who will probably die of disease, who lost their hair 
because of this, and you are critizing them? What if your wife or daughter 
got cancer and lost all their hair? You really are very ungrateful.

"God wants women to cover their head and faces since they are unclean and 
filthy sinners." Excuse me? But im sure there are more men in prison these 
days then women... This is just gross comment and god-bless your wife. If i 
were her, i would commit suicide. Why do you think god made the lady second? 
Because he fucked up the first time around.

You forgot your picture on the most wanted list.

God created us in his own image, but if god is black, then wouldnt white 
people be slaves? the people were black because of how they adapted to they 
geological location. If africa and america were to switch places im sure you 
would be black right now instead of white. How could you support slavery? 
The beating of people, and some of the blacks were even christian.

"American Breast Cancer Society" Is an organization to help women with this 
fatal disease, lesbian or straight, what would you do if your wife got 
breast cancer? Your just a steriotyping asshole.

There was this girl at my school, rachel, i think her name was. She was 
very, like you, in a sense. The kids at my school beat the shit out of her 
and she got transferred. The kids at school rumor that she has a stars and 
bars flag on her house. Now i feel bad for her. She has to put up with a 
father like you, who brainwashed her into what she is today. Now i wish i 
could have befriended her, and helped her.

Your veiws on rape are very interesting, though i have no comment towards 
them souly because of how redicilous they are.

Alright now, this is insane. Kick out your kids? Fuck man, if your kid is 
someone you dont want them to be, then you can try and change them, but 
until they are 18, they are your fucking responsibility. You made them, you 
take care of them. You dont see God kicking us off earth and making us live 
on Mars. God doesnt say "oh your gay now, go live on the moon". Seriously, 
you need to forget whatever you may think about masturbation, and your 
little fake graph that you made, and do us all a favor, and go fuck 
yourself.

Im guessing you get all these statistics right out of your ass, i thought 
lying was a sin? Alright, these scholars studied math for years and years 
and years, and they come up with an equation that fits EVERY SINGLE fucking 
circle in the entire universe and you want to contradict it? are you crazy? 
stupid question. Whatever floats your boat, im sure you flunked out of math 
though. I didnt know the bible was famous for its hard-core algebra, or 
geometry, or whatever.

"Hey kids!! It's me, your pal, Jesus!" you are pretending to be jesus now? 
cant you go to hell for that?

What institution were you checked in to before you made this site? Tell them 
they lost their lunatic.

The earth is flat?????? wtf, and columbus fell off the side.

Im starting to think that you are someone who read the bible, and found all 
these things in it, just to make people not believe in it. Im started to 
believe your an athiest, or something else "non-chrisitian" if thats the 
case, then your doing an awesome job. Im thinking of showing this site to 
one of the pastors at a church near me. "Judge not according to the 
appearance, but judge righteous judgment." Then why judge blacks or people 
who wear goth clothing? hello whats wrong with you?!?!!? dude, ever watch 
7th heaven?

PS.....about your church, where is it? id actually like to go there some 
day....

_________________________________________________________

Thank you for your website. We are praying with you for God to reach the lost
through your site.

True Light Ministries has an Occult Awareness Christian Perspective Reference list
you might be interested in. Feel free to glean any info for your own site. 
Particularly, YouthFire Ministries with Dr. Gregory Reid  at
http://www.gregoryreid.com/  (looking at your web comments).

I am not requesting to be linked to your site right now. Though, you might
understand out stand in Christ better than some.

God be with you and your family!

In Christ Jesus, Pastor Joy, 
True Light Ministries

As i read your FAQ i saw that with all your answers you gave a references to
the bible, except for the aborion question, you seem like christian who
knows his bible well, why didn't you give a referenct to the bible on that
question? I've always lived under the impression that God is against
abortion, but seeing that answer made me think. Does the bible even state
that God is against abortion? In that case, where?

What happened to the forums?
I just went to the page, and it's gone... I am assuming that I missed an 
announcement that the forums were shutting down?

*sniffle
Mere

Is this website a joke?

M8 i dont no wot ur site is about xactly n i dont no how the hell i came across it!!
but point is ur as funny as... *thumbs up*

jst thought id say :)

from lucia (not a Christian)To play 'High Noon' with MSN Messenger  click here. 800
Logitech webcams to be won!

Hi. I would like to compliment you  one your ability in comedy...as it has 
never been one of my strong  points.
 
Here are a few pieces of  scripture that I believe you should examine. I 
would certainly appreciate  your input as you claim to take the Bible at it's 
word. The below comments  (Excluding those from the Bible) were written by a very 
intelligent,  open-minded (which you claim to be yourself) Christian  man.
 
Jesus Christ, having noted the faith and righteousness of a Roman  centurion, 
a Pagan, proclaimed: 

"Assuredly I say to you, I have not  found such great faith, not even in 
Israel! And I say to you that many will come  from east and west, and sit down 
with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob in the kingdom  of heaven. But the sons of the 
kingdom will be cast out into outer darkness.  There will be weeping and gnashing 
of teeth." (Matthew 8:10-12) 

If we accept these words as true,  and surely we should, then it is clear 
that heaven will contain many who are not  Christians, and hell will contain many 
who are! Clearly, throughout the Gospels,  Jesus Christ sets forth the 
criteria for entrance into the kingdom of heaven,  and those criteria include love, 
kindness, forgiveness, and a refusal to judge  others: 

"For if you forgive men their  trespasses, your heavenly Father will also 
forgive you. But if you do not  forgive men their trespasses, neither will your 
Father forgive your trespasses."  (Matthew 6:14-15) 

"For with what judgment you judge,  you will be judged; and with the same 
measure you use, it will be measured back  to you." (Matthew 7:2) 

"But go and learn what this means:  `I desire mercy and not sacrifice.'" 
(Matthew 9:13) 

"Therefore be merciful, just as  your Father also is merciful. Judge not, and 
you shall not be judged. Condemn  not, and you shall not be condemned. 
Forgive, and you will be forgiven." (Luke  6:36-38) 


Is it not clear? Anyone who fails  in these things, will calling himself a 
Christian save him? Anyone who obeys God  in these things, will being unbaptized 
condemn him? Jesus said, "Not everyone  who says to Me, `Lord, Lord,' shall 
enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does  the will of My Father in heaven." 
(Matthew 7:21)
 
But the Wiccans, you will say, do not have faith in God. Yet by their own  
theology, they certainly do. Those who call them Satan-worshippBut the Wiccans, 
you will say, do not have faith in God. Yet by their own  theology, they 
certainly do. Those who call them Satan-worshipp<WBR>ers are  entirely wrong. They 
do not worship Satan, or even


Now if you are a Christian, this will sound familiar to you, and it  should. 
In the Bible we find the following: 

"Then Paul stood in the midst of the Areopagus and said, `Men of  Athens, I 
perceive that in all things you are very religious; for as I was  passing 
through and considering the objects of your worship, I even found an  altar with 
this inscription: TO THE UNKNOWN GOD. Therefore, The One whom you  worship 
without knowing, Him I proclaim to you" (Acts 17:22-23) 

The Wiccans worship the Unknown God, as manifested to them in the  form of a 
Goddess and a God. Therefore, our Bible tells us they worship the same  God we 
do; and if they do not know this, we should know it!    
 
And as some may "enjoy" you're  antics, as this website is obviously a joke. 
Starting with your choice of  html. Add in your ridiculous "artwork" and your 
lack of insight and you  have a very funny website. However, it is dangerous, 
and offensive. It's nice  that you can have a few jokes about extremists with 
choice friends, but there  are other people in the world. There are people 
that could easily mistake this  site for reality, and actually harm people. You 
are telling people that they  should kill other people, which is not only a sin 
but illegal. Your site should  be shut down for good, whether you warn people 
about your hateful attitude or  not.
 

Thank you for your time, and forgive me of any wrong I may have  done you. I 
am not out to get you, simply to state that if you are to take the  Bible 
literally, make sure that you have all of your facts straight before you  start 
condemning everyone but yourself to hell.
 
              Sincerely,
A concerned young lady.

Hey
,
When I first came across your site, I had a pretty typical reaction.  Not 
basing my judgements off of my initial reactions (typically), I looked 
through it some more.  I found it to be pretty funny, and I liked the way 
you approached your satire.

This isn't just fanboy mail though, I'm sure you get enough of them...

Upon checking the site most recently, I saw your most recent post saying how 
you ran out of ideas and such.  This kind of sucked, cause I was looking 
forward to seeing some more of the humor I'd come to expect.  I can sort of 
understand though, you have probably been running the site on your own, 
providing all the content, coding, even the awsome artwork on your own for a 
few years now.

I was wondering what kind of submissions you were looking for.  Are you 
looking for additions to the sections you already have in place?  Or do you 
just want independent articles?  Or just anything that fits the site?

I really like what you're doing, and I'd hate to see the site ever come down 
due to anything like stagnation.  I enjoy it so much I'm even willing to do 
some work for it to keep it going, and really for me, that's a lot.  I've 
got a pretty decent knowledge of the bible, I spent 10 years-ish in a 
catholic institution.  I'm a bit rusty now a days, as I haven't picked up a 
bible in a while, but I've got a couple on the shelf, and there's always the 
near infinite resource of the internet.

If you want an example, or even just a full submission for your approval, I 
can do my best and hope it meets the standards of the site.

See ya,
Dave

You're going to hell you pedo you arse touching arse eater JESUS HATES
YOU!!!!!!!

Pastor Jim

Thanks for telling it like it is.

Perhaps one day you could explain how to distinguish "real" Christian sites from
"spoof" sites.
When surfing, I often notice Christian sites with bad grammar, poor spelling,
incoherent logic and a sanctimonious attitude, but I'm unsure if they are the real
thing or not.

Thanks, yours in the blood of baby Jesus
Jeff

I like this passage that shows how human and imperfect Jesus really was. He 
clearly shows in this and in many other passages, that God sent Him to Earth 
to bless the Jews, not the Gentilies/Canaanites/Anyone but Jews.  Doesn't 
that seem sort of hateful and racist?

Yes he did eventually help the woman out, but not without first showing 
signs of prejudice towards someone whom he knew nothing about. Seems really 
perfect to me...

Matthew 15:22-28 (New International Version)
New International Version (NIV)
Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

22A Canaanite woman from that vicinity came to him, crying out, "Lord, Son 
of David, have mercy on me! My daughter is suffering terribly from 
demon-possession."

23Jesus did not answer a word. So his disciples came to him and urged him, 
"Send her away, for she keeps crying out after us."

24He answered, "I was sent only to the lost sheep of Israel."

25The woman came and knelt before him. "Lord, help me!" she said.

26He replied, "It is not right to take the children's bread and toss it to 
their dogs."

27"Yes, Lord," she said, "but even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from 
their masters' table."

28Then Jesus answered, "Woman, you have great faith! Your request is 
granted." And her daughter was healed from that very hour.


Also, I think a good "Kidz Story" would be to tell the Adam and Eve story. 
And make emphasis on the part where the Bible tells us that our original 
sin, was to start thinking for ourselves.  That somehow, God had intended 
for us to be ignorant animals and servents to him for all time, but we 
screwed that up big time. Shame on us for wanting to be greater than an 
animal. Also, woman of course made the first mistake :D

Seriously, is this site for real?

I heard you say something which by law CAN PROBABLY GET YOU INTO A MENTAL
INSTITUTION:
 
It is hard to fight the Liberals these days. They have so engrossed their
religion of Science into our every day lives. They tell us we can't burn
witches or kill Catholics anymore (but we can still burn them in the media).
Us True Christians have been forced by the Liberals to give in a little and
call The Truth, "Christian Science". Yes, "Science" is Satan's word, but
people rather listen to the word "Science". All True Christians know that
Science is a silly thing for idiots only. Faith is ALWAYS superior and RIGHT
over Science. The Liberals brainwash most people otherwise, but they will
all BURN in Hell!! 

They tell us we can't burn witches or kill Catholics anymore: This statement
says that if you were allowed to , you would. for this you can't go to jail
for a crime you might commit. but mental institutions usually have a policy
of taking people who are "a danger to themselves or others".
 
what if I said Fuck off or ill burn your satanic bullshit evil false church
to the ground? You claim to be preaching truth when Jesus said, love your
neighbor. you said your neighbor were only true Christians, while in Jesus
parable describing this, he showed to opposite people. Jesus himself helped
a pagan in the bible. why don't you preach peacefully against others beliefs
instead of killing for them. it's much more effective...

God told someone we should kill you, what do you have to say about that. He told it
to another fundamentalist minister who has another website on the internet.

Of course I'm making a joke of sort. Unfortunately your site is no joke. If other
people believed as you do, there would be mass murders everywhere!

Pastor Jim,,, you are a "character"... to say the least.
I have very many ideas to share.... you said you're rather pumping dry on 
ideas for your website..
Historical, doctrinal, prophetic, etc....
             and very thought provoking.. because all are the TRUTH, which 
             has been perverted  by lay people, the media, and pastors 
alike...

            Be that as it is.. interested?

Signed,
A true believer in the Holy Scriptures and Jesus Christ....
Barry Miner

In regards to your writer's block: I remember that you once said you  
listen to an audio Bible in the car.  I've been ordering some philosophy  
courses from The Teaching Company (http://www.teach12.com), and I looked  
at a few of the religion and social science courses and thought of you.  I  
realize that you don't need the education per se, but sometimes hearing  
ideas from someone else's mouth helps me out of writer's block and I  
thought you might be interested.

Hi Asshole,

This test is funny:

What's Your Sense of Humor?
http://web.tickle.com/invite?test=1142&type=t

You can see how I scored at the end.


Kayla

Pastor Jim,

How about King Herod on your kids page, about how he killed all of the
boys under 2 years old in and around Bethlehem in a failed attempt to
kill the Christ Child (because Joseph and Mary went to Egypt after
God's angel warned them about the inpending massacre.)

You didn't answer my question about science and earth's age. All you
said was "bla bla bla. you're going to hell". That's not an answer.
Please be mature and give a real answer. I'm asking nicely.

Also, what do you think should be done about Justin Berry, the faggot
who jacked off for all those men on the internet for pay. I think he's
just as much a criminal as the guys who paid and watched him. I say
it's the bird cage for that Green Wing Macaw. (G.W.M., that is)

John

P.S. Reenie isn't the Anti-Bush. I am the Anti-Bush.

Blessed are the peace makers, for they shall be called Sons of God.

Listen, I'm mexican and I used to be an atheist (what could be worse than being an
atheist beaner), but after reading your website I felt like I was born again. I even
believe that jesus and God are Hot, I would ask them to fuck me If it was not a
sin...
 
Wait a Minute!!! It is not!! After all they both fucked Mary (since father and son
are one). Are you directly in contact with God?  Do you think I can get some of his
almighty seed? If they're not available I'd Like to have yours Jim ;-).T1msn Hotmail
Plus. Más espacio, más funcional Haz clic aquí

This has to be a joke no one can really believe all
this propaganda.

I am an Agnostic (Former Catholic), a Biker and a
Socialist. I found your web site very amusing made me
laugh very hard.

I went to Catholic School K-12 and what I was taught
was love love thy neighbor and Let he who is with out
sin cast the first stone. Well sir you are condemning
people and I think God is the only person whom can do
that.

Please respond if you are a real religion, I love
these kinds of debates.

_______________________________

Man I have a couple of things to say.  Now, a good portion of what you say is
completely vaild.  It is true that there were many books of the bible taken out and
several vital phrases either lost in translation or taken out when translated.  Now,
I don't get off on pissing people off on the internet because I think it's
pointless.  I believe you, however, have purposely extorted your "position" to try
and come off with a distorted explanation and/or humiliating comeback.  I would
consider myself a man of God.  I follow what I have learned with a true and whole
heart.  I do believe though and not to quote that the bible does say something about
loving your fellow man.  Now I do understand the fact that those people you called
"sand niggers" worship another god and so you believe that It would be almost a
blasphemous sin to not try and take justice on someone that worships a different
god.  Now, however, as much as you want to believe that the bible or any of the lost
books( which I have and read in Latin) say to take justice into your own hands; it
does not outside of eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth.  Which by the way was in the
Old Testament, which in the New Testament switched to turn the other cheek.  Believe
it or not, that was the whole point of Jesus's coming.  To prove that the fearful
and angry God that would smite a sinner at an instant, is not who he is.  Jesus came
to earth to prove that God loves everyone one, and there's no such thing as an
unforgivable sin.  Except one.  Blasphemy against the holy spirit.  Deny the
existance of God or Satan and you shall not be forgivin.  Now I understand the fact
that you are probably pissed and you're going to try and make fun of me but, how
about being intellegent and trying to make discussion.  I want to know what you have
to say.  So be an adult and prove me wrong.  Of course that's the thing about the
bible.  You cannot prove a thing.  So your efforts are in vain.  That's why we call
it faith.  In any case interested in your response.

Pastor Jim,

You have really done it now. No I never was a
christian but now you have just gave me the best
reason why. Your a
sexist-egotistical-prejudice-godforsaken-homophobe-bigot.
You are an outrage to any christian in the world. and
if you click out before reading this hole thing you
will have just proved me right. There is only one
person ONE person who is aloud to judge, and buddy
it's not you!. The things you have on your site is
apauling, I've showed it to some TRUE CHRISTIANS and
they are not happy, in a matter of fact I think
they're gunna send it i to the right athorities and
see what they can do about you or the web site. 
    Everything you said and did to the people on this
site is wrong and if you cant see that then maybe you
need to get some profesonial fuckin help! Yes I swore
at you, but from the e-mails I read I'm pretty sure
you're used to that. Just because someone is black, a
woman,fat,ugly,or anything eles that you slander, dont
mean that they are followers of SATAN (Which is pretty
sad yall christians had to make up another being to
blame your problems on, istead of taking the FREE WILL
that god gave you and taking resposabilty for your own
damn actions)or Athiests!
   It seems to me that you have some personal issues
you need to deal with and get your life straight. I
come from a religion that is in harmony with the world
and can see people for who they really are and not
judge them on apearance. Which, love, it seems like
you're doing. Those black peoplel on your site are
probably more into god then you are.  God doesnt want
you going around and telling people these things, all
you're doing, (If you belive in heaven and hell and
since you're  a true christian then you do)you're just
setting a place in hell for you. God is not an asshole
like you want him to be. You want some kind of control
and power and you know you can have it on the internet
cause no one can punch you in your face for the nasty
things you say. Oh be careful for those hackers out
there who can find out where you are and I feel sorry
for the day someone does find out what you're doing
and kicks the shit outta you.

You need to find something better to do with your time
then to put people down because you have no life. Get
a girlfriend and go on dates or whatever and relax. No
one needs an asshole like you in this world, we
already have enough, oh and if you e mail me back and
slander me, that just proves to everyone that I sent a
copy of this e-mail and link to your site . . . that
you are just as I said.

{~*Sherri*~} AKA ~Kat~

I know that most info on your site is suppprted by The Bible but not all of it. If
i'm wrong, prove it. I don't just want verse numbers, i want full quotes, just to be
sure. i need biblical verses supporting the following:
   
  -Your blatant racism, the arabs and asians i can understand due to religious
differences, but what about the blacks? most modern day black people are
christian. 
   
  -Proof that America was chosen by God as a holy land
   
  -Hatred towards video games, video games are fictional, and (despite popular
belief) do not lead people to imitate what is seen on them.
   

Pastor Jim-
I see your point about a lot of things on your web page, and 
I fing much of it interesting. It is, after all, most 
important that we trust the Word of God before the word of 
men. However, I recently read in the book of Isaiah the 
following verse: "He sits enthroned above the circle of the 
earth..." (Isaiah 40:22). God never declares outwardly that 
the earth is flat; however, he does outwardly declare the 
circle of the earth.

Also, I would not be a sister in Christ if I did not rebuke 
you for the way you respond to emails. Calling curious 
people "retards" and being sarcastic is not how we prove our 
message. As a man who follows the word of our awesome God, I 
would expect that you would also follow his teachings on 
speaking truth in love and being slow to anger. I hope taht 
you would respond with the same patience as God responds to 
you.
Forever in Christ,
A Sister

 Dude, are you serious about all this true christian stuff or is this like a parody
site?

hi pastor i was getting a great understanding of the messages you were 
trying to send. But there was one message that i didn't quite approve of, or 
understand why you wrote. Why would you use  a term like 'nigger lovers'? 
are you racist? If you are then you need to re check the bible, Jesus did 
not descriminate against anyone what so ever!
This is what you commented about atheists:
4.) Myth: Atheists are people to.

Reality: THEY ARE EVIL DEMONS! WRATHFUL AND HATEFUL NIGGER LOVERS!

i just came apon your site and i think you should know this. its fuckin